New Guinness?

Anyone see it in stores yet? Supposedly was released around the 25th, but I haven't been able to find it.

If anyone sees it, let me know; if you pick me up a sixer (not Brand, though, he's far too fragile), I'm yours forever.

Do you have Diabeetus?

Die die die die diabeetus?

Five pounds of pasta today!!!

Mad props to "she without a nickname" for cooking up 5 pounds of pasta last night.
Should be an enjoyable lunch during my last 12-16 hours @ Novo.

***SAN***

So 5 pounds of dried pasta came out to be 13 pounds cooked.
We (6 people) managed to eat a little over 6 pounds.
That comes out to ABOUT $.35 per person.

The moral is -- Olive Garden all you can eat is a rip off.

Life Imitates 'South Park'

* Cartman: "The city needs protection. There is an animal that lives by night, searches the trashcans and cleans out the garbage. To clean out the trashcan of society I've chosen to become more than a man. I'm the hero this town needs. I am . . . The Coon! As the world plummets into despair, The Coon fights to keep order intact."--from "The Coon," aired March 18


* "Cincinnati police have a new ally in their fight against crime, whether they want it or not. He calls himself Shadowhare, and he wears a mask and a cape to conceal his true identity. He's Cincinnati's own version of a superhero fighting crime and injustice where he finds it. "We help enforce the law by doing what we can in legal standards, so we carry handcuffs, pepper spray . . . all the legal weapons," said Shadowhare. 'We will do citizen's arrests. We will intervene on crimes if there is one happening in front of us.' "--WLWT-TV Web site (Cincinnati), April 28

Rebels

Wall St 2

Oliver Stone and Michael Douglas get The Bezzle. That's why they're making Wall St 2.

I'm laughing...

I'm not sure if it's because I've been staring at the computer screen for too long or if this is funny. I think it's the latter given the frustration of wading through bogus job ads on Craigslist. Enjoy.

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/wdc/987443049.html

fun on the web

State employees "share the pain"

10 Hours of Unpaid Leave!

Update on the naming of gata #2

I think we're going with:


TROGDOR!!!
TROGDOR!!!
Trogdor was a cat, um... she was a... dragon-cat!!!!Or...maybe...she was just a dragon, but she was still...
TROGDOR!!!
TROGDOR!!!
Burninating the country-side,
Burninating the Peasents!
Burninating all the people,
and their thatched-roof COTTAGES!!!
THATCHED-ROOF COTTAGES!!!

And then the Trogdor comes in the NIIIIIIGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHT!!!

Cytokine Storms

That is a scary thing that I'd never heard of. The more healthy you are, the more likely you are to die because it turns your immune system against you. Thus, the strongest immune systems are the most deadly.

The pig thing will likely pass, just like every other feared pandemic, but that Cytokine Storm is scary. Especially if you're like the Rear, who thinks the proportion of young to old is dangerously out of wack. This would cause more of that.

Okay, Let Someone

Stop. Think. Decide they should not fly a 747 being chased by two F-15s at 1,000 feet over New York City. Especially not without warning people.

The back up to Air Force One did two low level fly overs NYC for a Statue of Liberty photo op. I guess the F-15s were for effect?

News Flash

On July 28, Bob Dylan, Willie Nelson, and John Mellencamp will share the stage turf at the Durham Bull's field. General Admission tickets are $67.40 and if you buy tickets on May 4, you get access to your seats 30 minutes before sterage class.

Ultimate Frisbee pickup in N. Raleigh

I strongly recommend pickup play as a regular event when one has time. Don't worry about skill level. Some folks there may have played on a nationally recognized club team, but most will not. Additionally, Ultimate players are fairly committed to recruitment as more players = more games in the future.

Ultimate frisbee pickup 6PM - Millbrook exchange‏
Hey guys,


We're meeting again tomorrow night at 6PM at Millbrook exchange.
1905 spring forest rd for the GPS navigators that dont know where it is.
If you can't readily see us please walk towards the back of the baseball fields.
Tucked away on the corner is a field we've been using and its difficult to see from the parking lot.


Please come out and have fun, bring a friend, some water and 2 shirts.

It's supposed to be 62F low - 89F high. Plenty warm so bring plenty of water.

Hope to see you there

Sam

End the "War on Drugs" NOW!!!

Why in the holy fuck does the University of Georgia have a SWAT team that appears to have AR 15s which may or may not be full auto ???


This is just crazy. End the mindless drug way -- legalize it, tax it, and get our police back to the business of fighting real crime.

Slightly ineffective weekend

Dear sirs,

Traveling from Raleigh to Kitty Hawk for a wedding. Only thing I had was 2 bean burritos w. extra tomatoes. By the time we were at hotel, I was vomiting & cramping. Spent 8 hrs. in car, money for hotel, missed wedding & reception, didn't even get to spend any time on the beach. Mildly unhappy.

Pour out some liquor

Another one bites the dust

OMG !! SO much fun

Icy Hot Stunta name generator!!!

Chia Obama

Choose between Happy or Determined Chia Obama

Seriously does no one respect the office of the president? It is a little funny though.

Chia Obama

Mark it on your calendars!!!

Another cool thing for us to plan on going to and yet...

Too soon?

Sigh...goddamned formatting, click the pic for the "punch line".

Holy crap

I about started bawling.

Have one child .... PLEASE!!!

Current TFRs from the CIA World Factbook are as follows.

Japan: 1.21

South Korea: 1.21

China: 1.79

Taiwan: 1.14

Hong Kong: 1.02

Macau: 0.91

Singapore: 1.09

U.S.A.: 2.05


My boy Spengler connects the dots between "Fewer" and the 'Bezzel.

HT to Sweet Dee !!!

Very depressing. As a natural pessimist, I think our generation is basically fucked.
Our grandparents got a hella good deal with Social Security & Medicare, but we're gonna be stuck with trillions of debt & unfunded liabilities and no way to save / earn any kind of return on any asset class (other than oil!).
Anyway -- that shouldnt stop us from drinking !!!

Little bit of gender confusion

Apparently, both Reverend Mother Gaius Helen Mohiam and "Camp Sleep Away" are female.



Anyone have a good name for a female cat?

question about cred1t sc0re

This guy I know checked his credit sc0re via exp3rian and found his score at 803. In the overall world of credit rating, where does that place a guy? Especially if he realized his primary worktodaycare vehicle is over 11 years old with some occasionally tough miles on it. . .

2 Good, 1 Bad

So on Sunday we are working out at the manhole and make a decision to attempt pullovers with 135lbs. After a few it was quickly understood that a few was all that could be done, mostly because trying to do a pullover combined with a skullcrusher may indeed do just that.

So what is the aftermath you might ask......?

Well it seems my triceps are in a permanent state of flex which is somewhat painful. This creates 2 good things and 1 possibly horrific thing.

Two Good: Triceps are huge!, Ripped the sleeve of my polo today

One Bad: I'm fearful it may stay this way forever, as it feels like my tricep is rolled up like a window shade.

How much fun did YOU have in high school ???

Donkeyball

Is there anything you CANT do with bacon???

The "bacon lance"

RNC President = Funny!

For the past couple of months the RNC and Fox News have been planning various Tea Parties around the country as a protest to the new bugdet and increase in taxes.

So on the RNC website, Michael Steele is urging everyone to send a "Virtual Teabag" to Democrats as a show of opposition.

Now that's some funny shit!

The sport of real men!!1

ANNAPOLIS, Md. - It began with a challenge from the Naval Academy to its tiny neighbor college in Annapolis: Just try to beat us at any sport. So St. John's proposed a game of croquet, and a wild, weird tradition was born.

This is the 27th year for the Annapolis Cup croquet match between the two schools, which is held on the campus of St. John's. If you've ever played croquet in your backyard, you know it involves using a mallet to knock balls through small metal hoops called wickets. The Annapolis Cup is a nine wicket game.

For the competition, the Mids always wear crisp white pants, shirts and cardigan sweaters with colored ties in accordance with U.S. Croquet Association code. The Johnnies choose kooky costumes that are kept secret until just before the match. This year they dressed up as bare-chested warrior Vikings with beards and horned helmets. St. John's team member Ben Hutchins says it was an obvious choice, "because Vikings, you know, they always win at sea. We've got to beat the sailors!"

"Uncle Screwtape" and "Reverend Mother Gaius Helen Mohiam" are doing fine

Both a drinking water and using the litter box.



BTW -- PAIGE FOX IS BAD AT MATH.

*** SAN ***
The person referred to by the Sidekick as "May 1", whom I refuse to give a nickname to, and therefore we cannot reference on the blog using her meatspace name, has brought it to my attention that my kitten naming skills leave much to be desired.

DIRTIEST MOVIE HEADLINE YOU’LL SEE TODAY

It took a few days

Too funny

I think this pic hits all of our key demographics

Does Bikini Razor Commercial Go Too Far?

Crap

Frost Advisory
Wake (North Carolina)

URGENT - WEATHER MESSAGE
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE RALEIGH NC
330 PM EDT THU APR 16 2009
...FROST ADVISORY IN EFFECT FROM MIDNIGHT THROUGH 9AM FRIDAY...
.SKIES WILL REMAIN CLEAR OVERNIGHT AND WINDS WILL BECOME CALM.
THIS WILL ALLOW TEMPERATURES TO COOL INTO THE MID 30S DURING THE
OVERNIGHT HOURS...LEADING TO THE FORMATION OF FROST BY DAYBREAK FRIDAY.
NCZ007>011-021>028-038>043-073>078-083>086-088-089-170330-
/O.NEW.KRAH.FR.Y.0002.090417T0400Z-090417T1300Z/
PERSON-GRANVILLE-VANCE-WARREN-HALIFAX-FORSYTH-GUILFORD-ALAMANCE-
ORANGE-DURHAM-FRANKLIN-NASH-EDGECOMBE-DAVIDSON-RANDOLPH-CHATHAM-
WAKE-JOHNSTON-WILSON-STANLY-MONTGOMERY-MOORE-LEE-HARNETT-WAYNE-
ANSON-RICHMOND-SCOTLAND-HOKE-CUMBERLAND-SAMPSON-
INCLUDING THE CITIES OF...ROXBORO...OXFORD...HENDERSON...
WARRENTON...ROANOKE RAPIDS...WINSTON-SALEM...GREENSBORO...
HIGH POINT...BURLINGTON...CHAPEL HILL...DURHAM...LOUISBURG...
NASHVILLE...ROCKY MOUNT...LEXINGTON...ASHEBORO...PITTSBORO...
RALEIGH...SMITHFIELD...WILSON...ALBEMARLE...TROY...
SOUTHERN PINES...SANFORD...LILLINGTON...GOLDSBORO...WADESBORO...
ROCKINGHAM...LAURINBURG...RAEFORD...FAYETTEVILLE...CLINTON
330 PM EDT THU APR 16 2009
...FROST ADVISORY IN EFFECT FROM MIDNIGHT TONIGHT TO 9 AM EDT
FRIDAY...
THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN RALEIGH HAS ISSUED A FROST
ADVISORY...WHICH IS IN EFFECT FROM MIDNIGHT TONIGHT TO 9 AM EDT
FRIDAY.
COOL HIGH PRESSURE SETTLING INTO REGION OVERNIGHT WILL ALLOW TEMPERATURES
TO DIP INTO THE MID 30S BY DAYBREAK FRIDAY. THIS ALONG WITH LIGHT WINDS
WILL LEAD TO THE FORMATION OF WIDESPREAD FROST ACROSS ALL OF
CENTRAL NORTH CAROLINA.
PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTIONS...
A FROST ADVISORY MEANS THAT FROST IS EXPECTED. SENSITIVE OUTDOOR
PLANTS MAY BE KILLED IF LEFT UNCOVERED.
$$

I cant get the embed to link correctly

BUT trust me... VERY VERY VERY funny

Delicious AND dangerous -- the BaK 47

Powered by beer apparently!

At ease ladies!

Not That He Inspired Confidence Before

It's not like I was going to vote for him anyhow, but he wrote me a letter saying things are fine about the same day Richard Burr starts a bank run in North Carolina.

Je suis fini !!!

"Only" owe $26 federal. After multiple 10 grand years, I see this as a victory for the forces of light and goodness.

Based on Sweet Dee's battles against NC, I assume I'll never see my state refund.

Me likey!!!

Manhole is...

open for business

Werewolf

Ryan Adams is releasing a death metal album under the name Werewolf. That is all.

***SAN***

Worst. Thing. Ever.

This should be fun

I am guessing that we should be able to fill this in and come up with some funny stuff. To comply with the StRA rules we can omit the republican part. It was just the first picture that I saw that had empty caption boxes

Nascar fans

Even without writers, "You da man" is some funny shit

We REALLY need to get some writers on staff

Barney's Blog is quite funny.

You know how I know you're gay? Your husband.

I'm THINKING today might be the day I do my taxes

I believe the 'Uar & I will be helping H.E.P. install his punching bag, and then I need to get my ass in gear and get my taxes done.

Happy Zombie Jesus day everyone!

At least we know the infection takes 3 days to reanimate them. Had there only been a shotgun in ancient Jerusalem, we may have stopped the infection in time!

Which is it you ass hats

So Wells Fargo Bank, that's the one that borrowed $20 billion in ememergency funds from the government and then got even more to assist their acquisition of Wachovia, is in the news this morning. Turns out this was their most profitable quarter in their history, registering $3 billion in profit ($1 billion/month).

What's up with that? Did they lie about their emergency need for funds and a backstop to buy Wachovia. Or are they lying about the profit to pump the stock? It's gotta be one.

F Them.

Happy Passover!

Happy Passover everyone!

Put out the Seder Plate. Read the Haggadah. Had the Matzoh Ball soup, Brisket, and Charoset!

Great stuff!

For the big boy

I know you missed lunch the last few days, but I don't want you to think that he forgot about you:

need some help guys

As I am preoccupied with my wife right now I cannot really research like I normally could, ways to mount the heavy bag. We have approximately 10 ft ceilings so we would only need about a 3 ft chain if we were to mount to ceiling joist butbi am a little concerned about bag movement. If you guys find anything useful let me know. Fyi the bag came with a tether at the bottom of it.

Settle all your bar arguments

412-924-FACT

Coworker from PA told me about this--a free fact checking service by the University of Pittsburgh. We were wondering about the alcohol content in a number of light beers, she calls and we have an answer in less than 2 minutes. How have I never heard of this?

I did question posting it...in the right hands it could be come extremely obnoxious.

Dad's cleaning solution

this should make scrubbing easier.

SICK!

That is all.

First period.

There, all corrected now.

Total students for the day = 5.

Trolling or Sympathy

So yesterday was heckuvalotta fun but I'm falling apart today. After leaving the receptin at (I think) 10:00, I went for a multi-mile run with my neighbors. Let me go through my condition:

1) Sore, sore legs (first real run in years)
2) Sore, sore balls (ala Sidekick)
3) Sore sore back/arms (install a retaining wall yeseterday morning)
4) Sore throat (smoking seemed good at the time)
5) Sore head (that's what a $100 bar bill gives you)
6) More than a wee bit dehydrated (actually stopped sweating for a while)

Let's just say it's not my most productive of days.

This could be awesome

Anyone?
Anyone?

Had the most bad assed dream I've had in QUITE a while

It involved heat sucking "vampires" but they were more wraith like and insubstantial, a mirror into their world of darkness & dust, and I'm pretty sure most of the members of G.I. Joe showed up. And died.

I MIGHT get fired from bouncing

So HEP gave me a flask as my groomsman present Saturday evening, which I promptly filled with whiskey.
I had a RAGING sore throat and had to work until 2. After we had cleared the bar out, I got myself a 1/2 coke, 1/2 whiskey and one of the waitresses saw me do this.
Now, she thought it was very funny, but as people are wont to do, she did tell other folks about this.
Oh, and I did it again when we got to the bar for the party.

Anyway -- I wont be surprised if that gets up to management or even the owner & I get shit canned. I agree in principle - they could lose their liquour license.


BTW -- thanks to massive amounts of medicine I was taking yesterday, I am 100% free & clear from any after effects of yesterdays shenanigans.

really? i can park here?

Pre wedding excitement

T-Bone and the C-Monster

are bound for the the City of Alexandria. The one in Virginia. Caleb takes his first train ride today. I'll try to drop some updates during the trip. Train to DC. Monday - Wednesday various venues at the National Mall and maybe the Zoo, depending on the weather. Was thinking about UdvarHazy center out at Dulles (Enola Gay AND SR-71 out there), but probably can't put the toddler through the metro and bus combination.

If trains like the Piedmont had a drinking car, I'd think more seriously about going to the Panther's games.

I like to encourage competition

So I suggested a slap bet between two students. (Un)Fortunately it was video taped and could now cause my termination.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I have searched for this video on youtube and cannot find it. When I do i will put it on here. It will probably hit when I am terminated.

HUGE topic of discussion last night @ dinner

was "dry aging" of beef.

BTW -- steak was DELICIOUS.

Funny

Remember the College Humor guys that did a fake proposal at Fenway Park? They did something quite funny at a Maryland Basketball game, too.
http://voices.washingtonpost.com/dcsportsbog/2009/03/last_nights_maryland_halftime.html

Step Brothers May Have...

the greatest post credits sequence in movie history (not really post credits, but post early credits).

best products ever

Dinner @ the Angus Barn tonight!

So some Dane-landers are in town for something, and are taking us out for dinner tonight.

SCORE!

Funny stuff

Best hoaxes EvAh.

Might need to tone down the schedule a wee bit.

Based on the fact we never actually can win @ trivia anymore when we go to Woody's, I'm probably going to call a scheudenfraude on Tuesday night shenanigans.

Any objections?
Duly noted.
Verdict has been rendered.